The Box
by Heather9979
Summary: It's Deeks' Birthday...will he open the box? (Probably a one-shot)


It had been another boring day at work for Deeks, or what was quickly becoming the norm since Kensi left weeks ago. He tended to spend his time filling out reports and hanging out in the firing range or the gym. He felt like the third wheel, he hated feeling like that. Today had been his birthday but it seemed nobody remembered again this year. He silently wondered if Kensi had remembered while she was off in God/Hetty/Granger knows where, wherever she was. He longingly looked on top of the lockers to where the box sat. The box that Kensi had given him after she had forgotten his birthday last year. It still sat where he had put it that day long ago when she told him that it contained the thing that he had wanted most in the world, and he was to this day afraid to open it and see what he would find. He was scared that she either didn't know him as well as he hoped and at the same time scared that she knew him better than he ever could have dreamed.

"Deeks! Man come on up here to OPS." Eric called from upstairs

Deeks shook his head and scratched the back of his neck absentmindedly. He needed to get his head back in the game. "What I'm not worthy of a whistle?"

"Nahhh everybody else is up here already waiting on you."

"Waiting on me? I figured that everybody had already left for the day."

Deeks slowly climbed the stairs. Every time he made this trek he was flooded with memories of all the times he had followed Kensi up those stairs. Seems that everything he did these days brought up a memory of Kensi. Most times they made him grin slowly then just as slowly that grin would fade and be replaced with the constant ache that had taken over his heart since that awful day. God he even sounded pathetic to himself. He even felt pathetic today, so he moped in to OPS and was greeted by all his coworkers and a few balloons and streamers and even a sign that said Happy Birthday!. Nell handed him a beer and gave him a quick hug.

"Wha?...When did you all have time to do this? I've been here all day? I guess that really doesn't matter though…thanks guys…..I needed this."

"Happy birthday Mr. Deeks. I trust you should be expecting a special phone call this evening….so keep your phone close" Hetty said as she was heading out of the room "I have some arrangements to make. You all enjoy yourselves and I'll see you all bright and early in the morning."

"Hetty." Deeks patted his side, the place that the Sat phone had been stationed since that night he had been given the best Christmas present he could ever remember. "Never leave home without it…thank you."

"You are welcome Mr. Deeks."

The rest of the team witnessed this conversation with mild confusion, that was soon forgotten as they took the party downstairs to the sofa.

As everyone finished their beer and pizza the headed out one by one….Deeks was left by himself yet again. The feeling on loneliness crept over him once again as he longingly looked at the box. Maybe it was time to take it home with him. He grabbed the box from on top of the lockers and headed out the door. He was having a mental argument with himself the whole way home on the merits of opening the box versus just leaving it closed.

He walked up to his front door and as he turned the key in the lock he heard Monty's tail thumping against the hallway table and his nails clicking on the floor as he happily pranced around, probably with his leash hanging from his mouth, waiting for his master's return.

"I'm coming, I'm coming Monty…..just give me a minute to set my box down."

He looked around his now messy house as he walked to the kitchen table. He had been so depressed lately that his OCD tendencies towards a neat house hadn't been in overdrive like they usually were. He pushed some stuff to the side and cleared a spot on the table to set down his box, then turned and grabbed Monty's lead clipped it to his collar and locked the door behind them. The two took a leisurely stroll to the beach where Deeks took a lonely seat in the sand and unclipped Monty's lead. The shaggy mutt took off at a dead run for the surf. Monty jumped and played and barked at the waves happily chasing them in and out. Deeks couldn't help but chuckle as he watched. He pulled out his sat phone for like the tenth time in the last five minutes and willed it to ring. Their phone conversations had been few and far between and usually very short, but they had quickly become the highlight of his seemingly very depressing existence lately. They had been very vague with little to no mention of feelings….he had vowed that tonight would be different. He owed it to Kensi and to himself to start being honest and opening up. It was almost as if he had willed the phone to ring as it started buzzing, matter of fact it scared him so bad he almost threw it in the air like he had the night he received it for Christmas.

"Uh…hello…hi Kensi?"

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Deeks….happy birthday to you."

"Uggg Kensi don't quit your day job….but thanks…it was music to my ears…..I..I really miss you."

"Miss you too."

"So…uhh how are classified things going? Any word on when you will be back?...Soon I hope… I mean I can only deal with Monty's moping and Tori Amos for so long…before ya know….I start going crazy. And from where I'm standing it would probably be a pretty short trip."

"Hoping to be back to you…I um mean back home soon."

In the background Deeks heard Granger say "Cut it short agent Blye we gotta go."

"I guess that's our sign that it's time to hang up?"

"Uh yeah…gotta go pretty quick. I have something extremely important to do tonight."

"Good luck with that babe….stay safe….promise me?"

"I promise…I promise I'm coming home to you soon…I uh..I…Happy Birthday"

"Thanks….I umm yeah…God why is this so hard? So I'm just gonna say it… I love you Kensi…I love you."

"wow..me too..I..wow…um ok Granger is looking all hateful at me…I um gotta go.."

CLICK is the sound he heard as the phone disconnected.

Wow…his mind was racing… he relived the short conversation in his head. Had he just told Kensi Blye that he loved her? Yes…he very distinctly remembered telling her that…Oh crap…what had he done. He probably scared her away forever…

Deeks called for Monty and headed home.

When he got home he did a quick glance around his apartment and something compelled him to clean it up. He collected all the trash and took it outside to the dumpster, finally changed the sheets on his bed, he came to the conclusion that there wasn't even a trace of her scent left on them, and threw a load of clothes in the washing machine. He cleaned up the kitchen. Not sure what really got into him other than the relief that he had finally told his partner..Girlfriend if she would still have him…how he felt. It was utterly refreshing. He felt as if a weight had been lifted off of him.

Deeks was pretty tired when he crawled into bed later that night. He had had a marathon cleaning session of his whole apartment which had finally been restored to it's previous state of cleanliness. Not to mention that it had been an emotionally draining day. He quickly fell asleep and slept so soundly he almost didn't hear the buzzing coming from the phone next to him….he instantly sat up wide awake. Why on earth was the sat phone ringing at this hour? They had already talked once today…Oh…what if something had happened. He picked up the phone almost scared to answer it.

"Huh…uh Hello."

"Hey Deeks…were you sleeping?"

"Yeah Kens…it's almost midnight here princess….are you ok?

Then he heard it…someone was knocking on his door.

"What the he..hold on Kens…someone is at my door.."

He carried the phone with him cradled between his shoulder and ear as he loaded his weapon and headed to the door. He peeked out the peephole and dropped everything to the floor with a thud. He snatched the door open. "Ke…Kensi?"

She looked at her watch…11:58pm. "Happy Birthday!...I made it in time."

He pulled her into a tight hug…"Best. birthday present. EVER!"

"Uhh Deeks..I'm really here..I promise and I'm not going anywhere…..really…I can't breathe…DEEKS!."

"Come in…please come in…you look exhausted…I mean don't get me wrong you look great, just tired."

"I've been traveling all day..I am pretty beat."

"So..uh….do you just want to lay down and cuddle with me? We'll have plenty of time to talk tomorrow."

"Yeah…yeah that sounds….heavenly."

As they walked down the hall past the kitchen Kensi spotted the box sitting on the table. "Whoa….wait a minute..is that my..I mean your box? Did you open it?"

"Uh…yeah it's my box…and I thought about opening it…but didn't."

"Why not? Open it! Open it…I really want you to open it….open it tonight…pleeeeease."

"Um..Kensi I'm not so sure…I mean you just got back..which was better than anything in this box could ever be…lets just go to bed princess…"

"No…I'm not going anywhere until you open the freaking box Deeks."

"Ok…ok I'll open it."

Kensi handed him a knife…

"How did I know you of all people would have a knife on you?"

"open it!"

Deeks sliced the tape on top of the box. It was silly really how hard and fast his heart was beating..I really was just a silly box, so why all the anxiety. He looked at Kensi, who was looking at him with anticipation.

"Just open the box Deeks….I hope you like it."

He pulled open the flaps and looked in the box….he looked at Kensi…his eyes full of questions…

"Wha…what is all this?" He asked as he pulled out a framed picture of the two of them together as well as several small books. "These…these look like the journal that I read….is this a trick? What…wh.." He pulled her in for a quick kiss…and looked at her in awe…he finally understood what was in the box and it meant more to him that any other gift ever could. "I love you" He said against her lips before deepening the kiss.

"I want you to have all of those….we all know my communication skills….well they aren't the best either…and I finally decided last year that I want you to know me…all of me…all my thoughts, my dreams,my hopes, and my fears…there is absolutely nobody else that I would trust with all of that…..I…I love you too Marty Deeks….now about this cuddling and sleep….let it commence."

They finished the walk down the hall to the bedroom. While Kensi grabbed one of his shirts to sleep in and went to the bathroom to change he hopped in to the bed and tried to digest everything that had happened in the past 24hours….he swallowed. Kensi had in essence given herself to him…heart, body, and soul…she had given him her trust…and she had admitted that she loved him…he was still trying to digest it when her warm body climbed in next to his….he pulled her close and wrapped his arm around her and kissed her neck. "Get some sleep princess…..we have a lot of catching up to do tomorrow….I love you."

Kensi rolled over and looked him in the eyes… "I love you too."

They had just snuggled in and gotten comfortable with his arm draped across her and her head on his chest…it just felt right to both of them. She was relaxing and inhaling his scent almost drifting off to the most peaceful sleep she'd had in months when her sat phone started ringing.

"umm hello?"

"Ms. Blye…I trust you made it home safely."

"Yuh yeah Hetty…I'm home…and safe…."

"I'm glad Ms. Blye…now let me talk to your partner please."

"Wha..How…nevermind….Deeks…it's for you…."

"Yeah…."

"Mr. Deeks…please accept my belated birthday present and take tomorrow off to reacquaint yourself with your partner….but do bring her by to see everyone….we missed her too."

"Yeah…ok….thanks Hetty…will do. See you all tomorrow."


End file.
